As a Trans man, I have had an interesting double life. The first 24 years, I lived as a female....a butch dyke. I loved many women over those years, and all of them were lesbians....from femme to soft butch. During this time, I had a battle raging within myself....was I butch?....or something more? Was I trans? Was I something else?

After days, weeks, and months of trying to answer these questions, doing research, reading personal stories.....I came to the conclusion that I was indeed trans.....a man trapped in the body of a female. My partner at the time, a super high-femme lesbian, stood beside me as I waded through the process of beginning transition. She even had her therapist meet with me to confirm that I was indeed trans. Within a month of that meeting, I changed my name, began hormones and due to the policies in place within the state I resided in, had my driver's license gender marker changed to male. For the first time in my life, I felt more at home within my own skin than at any other time.

Fast forward to today....now 14 years or so later....

In the time between my first days in my true identity and now, I have been on one heck of a roller coaster ride. From the changes to my body, to the changes in sexuality. I have gone from being a butch dyke who only interacted with men at work to being a pansexual, polyamorous trans guy. I hardly ever see gender in my partners, and I am capable of having loving and lasting partnerships with multiple people at the same time.... Cis men, cis women and everything in between.

Does this make me odd or strange? To some...maybe. But to me, and in general my partners, it just makes me the common denominator in all their lives. Don't get me wrong.....femme lesbians still get my heart racing and such, but now add to the mix bears and muscular men....who bring out pure sexuality and lust.

Gender is in the eye of the beholder.....and to the outside world I am the average redneck country boy...that is until I reveal myself as something much more. My trans identity has opened up a rather interesting world of dating....one that spans the straight and LGBT communities. Within both communities I am "stealth", no one can pick me out of a crowd of cis gender folk.....but once I reveal who and what I am, I become intriguing and potentially available to lesbians, bisexual men and women, straight women, and other trans folk....and very occasionally straight men. All of which can become rather complicated, especially if the other person begins to question themselves.

-LWFTM